Wedding planning ain’t easy, folks.
I know you probably just started, and you don’t wait to hear this, but it ain’t easy. It’s better you know now then find out the hard way later. I’ll always keep it real with ya’ll, so I have to say setting the budget is actually a pretty big deal. Unless you’re like rollin’ in that dough and have no limits, you’ll want to really do this right.
Here’s why: weddings are more expensive than you’d think. What you would consider the basics in a wedding (flowers, photographers, venues, etc.) are even more expensive than you can fathom, and there are so many unexpected costs that pop up along the way. At least that’s how I felt…
I think it’s important to have maximum numbers and a bit of a contingency budget in place so that you have wiggle room in case things end up popping up or being more expensive than you planned for. I also think it’s important that you don’t just have $30,000 as a maximum number and then start entering into contracts with further.
My suggestion, something I didn’t do, but wish I had: set budgets for as many aspects of your wedding as you can. That way you have smaller numbers to deal with and to allocate expenses to.
Alright, let’s get into my six steps to making your wedding budget. This pairs nicely with The IMOH’s Ultimate Wedding Planning Binder… just sayin’.
Step one: determine who’s paying
What this means is have that conversations with your parents, your fiancé, etc. I will tell you the very traditional route is that the bride’s family pays for the wedding and the groom’s for the rehearsal dinner. BUT it’s 2017 folks, so that’s just not a given, and really shouldn’t be!
I would say start by having the conversation with your fiancé, see what they expect and then talk to each set of parents after that. It should be an open conversation, and in my opinion, is a big one. Be gentle and remain aware of their reactions. I think sometimes parents want to pay for all of it, but aren’t quite in the financial position to do so. Hopefully, you’d be able to pick up on the cues and go from there.
This could also be after step 4… it all depends on the party/parties paying for it. What I mean by that is that you may want to determine your budget and then share that amount with (for example) mom and dad. You may want to see if they’re still willing to pay for the full amount OR if you guys (the couple) want to pick up the remaining amount they can’t afford/don’t want to spend.
Leaving it as step one means mom and dad (or whoever) set a budget, and you guys just have to (graciously) stick within in.
You know your families and your fiancé, so just try and make the best personal choices for everyone involved. No matter what size or kind of wedding you end up having this is a big financial undertaking, so don’t forget that.
Step two: decide what’s important to you
This is the fun part. This is where fiancé and you snuggle on the couch and chat about your dream wedding. What are the top three to five things that are important to you both when you imagine this day. Do you want everyone dancing (ergo a great DJ or band)? Are quality photos and videos something you think you can’t live without? Do you envision a destination wedding or elaborate venue?
Pick those items that you’re willing to spend above average for. These are the things you’ll really want the meat of your budget to go to.
On the same token, three to five things that you care less about. I would suggest doing as many as you picked for the “important to us” part. Does having a cake not really appeal to you? Do you feel like wedding favors just get thrown away?
If this part is hard, because you’re awfully attached to every traditional wedding thing ever (that was me), force yourself to come up with three things. That way if you have to give up something or scale down, you’ll have already made the hard decision. If possible purchase these things towards the end, that way you’ll be able to measure it against your contingency amount and see if you have to scale back.
Step three: take a look at how much everything costs
One of the biggest wedding budget mistakes I think I made was just having NO clue how much a wedding would cost. I had one person I could ask general questions to, but I found myself constantly asking “is that really how much a bouquet costs?!” or “how much should I be spending per person on food?!”
I would suggest taking time to really research this stuff. You’ll see a lot of different numbers and calculations out there, so just try to compile them all and take the average. It’s not necessary that you have a perfect number, but even seeing the percentages each item makes up of the entire budget can give you a great base.
I have several pins and helpful articles in the Pinterest board at the bottom of this post, but I’ll start you with the median costs of weddings in the U.S. in 2017. It’s $26,720. Yikes.
Step four: make a max spending number
Okay this is the big number. The one where you or the party paying for it says “I will not spend a dime above $x,000.”
Make that number based on step three and just general financial capabilities. Determine that number. Respect that number. Stick with that number.
It sounds simple, but it sure as heck isn’t! We’ll try to make it easier by making a contingency budget.
Step five: divide in sections and assign these max spending numbers
This means taking into account your max number from step four AND the most important things to you from step two.
Here are categories, I would suggest putting a budget number to:
- Wedding Planner
- Ceremony location
- Ceremony fees
- Bride attire
- Groom’s attire
- Wedding rings
- Music/DJ
- Favors and gifts
- Catering/bar
- Rentals
- Cake/dessert
- Flowers
- Photographer/Videographer
- Ceremony & Reception decor
- Stationary
- Transportation
- Contingency/miscellaneous
Leave yourself at the very least $1,500 in the last category, and if you divide up the rest of the amount and have extra, just add it to that category. Seriously, don’t underestimate unexpected costs.
Step six: keep it all organized
You can do this however you think is best: make a spreadsheet on Excel or Google Sheets, just add it to your wedding notebook OR, if you need help keeping it cute and together, you can use my Ultimate Wedding Planning Binder. This has way more than a budget and is a PDF printable so you print the pages you need to keep it organized as frequently as you’d like. Check it out here.
Okay, I think that’s all, but I also think I misled you when I said this is the hardest, because the more I think about it the more I think sticking to your budget is actuallyyyy the hardest.
GOOD LUCK.
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